


Mask

by morgan_cian



Series: Let Me See You [3]
Category: CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-05
Updated: 2013-07-05
Packaged: 2017-12-17 19:18:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/871077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morgan_cian/pseuds/morgan_cian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick wants to see behind the mask</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mask

Nick was ready to put his fist through a wall. He had done everything he could imagine. The man that he fell in love with was just beyond his reach. Hidden behind a heavy work load, a more serious demeanor, and a stand offish attitude.

 

It had been hell. First the beating, then coroner’s inquest, the civil suit, and finally the city in its infinite political wisdom decided to save face by cutting its losses and feeding Greg to the wolves. And the icing came in the form of Aaron James and Greg being called into question once again.

 

The once bright vibrant man became a more serious, quiet adult. Most praised the change. It showed in Greg’s work as a CSI. But Nick knew better. Greg had always been good at his job despite his comical antics. What frightened Nick was the light in Greg’s eyes was gone. He hid behind a mask and no one was the wiser.

 

It was Nick that held him through all of the shit. When Greg would let him, which wasn’t very often. He kept his armor firmly in place hardly every reacting. If Nick could put his finger on it there were two distinct cracks. The first, when he was beaten and bruised, being told that Demetrius James had died. His cracked lips had trembled and his fingers had twitched.

 

Grissom told him about Greg’s tears over his mother. Having met Mrs. Sanders, Nick was surprised the Greg had showed the emotion. When he got to his beaten lover’s side, everything was under control. He had sat at his bedside as Greg murmured into the phone and reassured his mother. No, Greg’s defenses hadn’t broken down. He kept a stoic mask firmly in place with Nick.

 

The second crack had come with the news that the city had settled. They were deep in the case of the multiple show girls. And Grissom in his wisdom, in an aside, “By the way,” had brought Greg’s world down around his ears. Nick had found him in the shadowed parking lot with his hands in his pockets, his chin on chest, and his shoulders shaking. His lover must have sensed his presence, because he went ramrod straight and kept his back to him.

 

“Not now, Nick,” Greg had said hoarsely and walked to his car. Nick, not Nicky, not Tex, but Nick, he had been dumbfounded to watch him drive off the parking lot without another word.

 

They were together as a couple, sharing a bed, but more like roommates. They shared a job and a space, but not a life. Drastic times took drastic measures. Nick was going to put a stop to it before the mask became permanent and he lost the man behind the mask forever.

 

For once, he was glad that their home was situated in a secluded cul de sac, with no nosy neighbors close by. He put their dog, Rampart into the house and left a note for Greg to meet him in the back yard. He was drawing a line in the sand. Greg would either meet him and they would have it out. Or it would be ignored and Nick would know that it was finally over. He would lose the other half of his heart. He heard the sound of the garage opening and Greg’s vehicle being disengaged. It was now or never. His heart beat painfully in his chest as he waited.

 

And waited.

 

And waited. His eyes began to burn and his body trembled. This was folly, he thought brushing his tears away. He would stay with Greg, even with the mask. He couldn’t bear life without him. They had been through too much to let this be what ended it. Stalkers, explosions, burials, beatings, they had survived.

 

“What do you want, Nick?” Greg sounded defeated but close by. Nick jerked and turned. His heart stopped.

 

Greg stood before him in an old t-shirt and low slung jeans. His hair was wet and curling from a recent shower. He looked small and vulnerable. His eyes were dark and expressionless.

 

He licked his lips and dove in head first. “This has to stop.”

 

Greg shrugged and made to turn away. “Whatever, I don’t have time for this.”

 

Nick grabbed his bicep to stop him. “Don’t have time for what, G?”

 

His wounded lover pulled away and spat out, “You, this, whatever the hell this is. I’m tired of your shit, Nick. I’m tired of the whining. You want us over? You want to lay down an ultimatum? Fine, I’m gone.”

 

Nick had tried to be gentle. He had tried to be understanding. He tried cajoling. But if he was going to lose the best thing in his life, he was going down fighting.

 

“Finally,” He sneered even as it hurt, “Finally you show some emotion.”

 

Greg froze. “Whatever? I’m gone.”

 

“Run away,” Nick said his voice hard and cold. “Yeah, you are good at that.”

 

Nick watched as Greg’s hands fisted and his body shook. “Fuck you, Nick.”

 

“Fuck me?” In for a penny, in for a pound, “Would love for you to, baby boy, but you can’t even get it up anymore? You won’t let me near you. You are hiding, G. You’ve been hiding behind this mask since the attack.”

 

“You bastard,” Greg gritted. “You don’t understand. You weren’t even there. It was Sara. Where the fuck were you?”

 

Now they were getting somewhere. “G,” He lowered his voice. “I came as soon as I could. I’m tired of this. Let me see you.” Greg snorted derisively. Nick ploughed on. “Let me see you, baby. Let me see what you are hiding behind the mask. Let me see your pain. Let me help you.”

 

“Pain?” Greg voice rose, “What do you know about pain? You weren’t left for dead, bleeding in an alley. You didn’t kill a kid.” Greg’s face was pale and his body rigid.

 

“Then give it to me,” Nick demanded. “Give me the pain. I can handle it. I can…”

 

His words died as Greg flew at him, fists flailing madly. His wind was knocked out of him as he hauled them to the ground. Still Greg fought, like a wild thing but there wasn’t any power behind the blows. The fists slowed until Nick could gather his lover into his arms. Greg squirmed half heartedly but the tears were of a wounded animal.

 

“Why, Nicky?” He tipped back his head and howled, “Why did he have to come at me? My foot slipped, I just meant to scare him, to make him stop. He was going to crush that man’s skull with a rock. Why? Why? Why?” He pulled out of Nick’s arms and rocked back and forth. “I don’t even carry a fucking gun. And I was the one. I was the one who fucked up and took a life. Why didn’t he just run away?”

 

Nick kept back. It was time for healing. Greg had to get it out or the wound would continue to fester, slowly killing him from the inside out. He wanted to fix it, to protect his lover from his demons.

 

“I see how they look at me,” Greg muttered, curling his arms around his knees. “I’m the murderer and I got away with it. I can’t do my job because I’m a disgrace. I try to hold it together. It just gets too big.” The watery brown eyes turned onto Nick. “I tried to keep it from you. You have already been through your hell, you don’t need mine. I don’t deserve you, Nicky. You don’t deserve a life with a murderer.”

 

Nick inched closer. “My life is with you, baby. It always has been and it always will be. When I look at you, I see my Greg, my G, everything that makes me get up and face the day. You are mine and I’m yours, through the hell and to the other side. We don’t know what tomorrow will bring, baby. But I have your back. I know this is killing you but you gotta let me help you. You’ve got to let me see your pain. Let me see you. It’s the only way that I can help. It’s been killing me to be shut out of your life.”

 

His arms were suddenly full. It rocked him back into the grass with Greg straddling his hips.

 

“I love you, Nicky,” Greg whispered, eyes tear swollen, tear tracks drying on his cheeks. “I don’t deserve you.”

 

“I feel the same,” Nick replied, cupping the beautiful face. “I don’t know what lucky star shined down on me the day I met you. I just know I can’t live without you. You, not this act that you show everyone else. If it gives you strength to get through the day, so be it. But don’t hide from me anymore. Don’t give me the mask, give me the pain. Just be with me, baby.”

 

Greg nodded as he lowered himself, their lips meeting in a sweet, gentle kiss. It was salty with tears, but the taste was Greg and he had missed it. He kissed his lover desperately, not wanting to let go even as his lungs threatened to burst.

 

Greg’s soft hair tickled his chin as the younger man burrowed against his neck. The long slender fingers intertwined about his own, “You still want me?” The voice was soft and child like.

 

“More than anything but it doesn’t have to be tonight,” Nick said in an after thought. He wanted to make love to Greg but after such an emotional purge, he wasn’t going to push it.

 

A warm hand cupped his groin, massaging him through his pants. He couldn’t bite back the moan, “G, really, baby, you don’t...” His protest was cut off by soft lips against his own.

 

“I want to,” the warm breath ghosted against his ear making him shiver, “I’ve held back for far too long. Take me to bed, Tex.” The nickname made him smile. “Take me to bed and make love to me.”

 

He led his wayward lover into their home and up the stairs. He couldn’t let go. He was afraid that if he did, his Greg would be gone. Hiding behind the mask and unreachable.

 

Nick undressed him slowly, reacquainting himself with silky smooth skin, the places that made Greg moan, and the landscape of scarring across the broad back. He worshiped the hard flesh between trembling thighs, cradling the tender sac in his hand. When he sank into the tight warm wet heat, long slender legs wrapped around his waist pulling him close.

 

It wasn’t hurried, it wasn’t frantic, it wasn’t fucking. When Greg’s release spilled between them, Nick cradled him close against his chest. When his seed filled Greg, his heart stuttered. Greg cupped his face and kissed him. Greg held him as he shook with the magnitude of being joined with his lover.

 

When they lay in each other’s arms after their shower, Greg opened up and let go of the things that he held inside. Nick listened, never interrupting, never stopping the up and down motion of his hand against Greg’s spine.

 

When the emotional roller coaster turned into exhaustion, Greg’s head was against Nick’s chest above his heart. The slender thigh rested between Nick’s legs. Nick’s arms held him close. Masks removed, naked emotion revealed, love enduring.

  



End file.
